Natuke huumorit vol.27nu tänases Cobra 11-s oli ikka eriti võimeka maagi käsi mängus. üks onuke kihutas esimese põlve stangiga poistelt eest ära ja mingil hetkel oli massin teelt välja sõitnud, katuse peal ja plahvatas. mingi ime läbi oli asjal pärast avariid vähemalt esimene ratas vanakooli rekordi oma (kilp peal ja puha)
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Flick the Gestapo.... No, I said *Flick*, the Gestapo!
Natuke huumorit vol.27Elu24 on korraldanud mingi huvitava TOP'i. Kui nüüd võrrelda seda näiteks Genfi autonäitusega ja mõelda ürituse nimele siis poleks vaja autodelt katteriideid maha võttagi...
Natuke huumorit vol.27Pärast lendu kirjutab piloot raporti, kuhu märgib vead. Mehaanikud
loevad raportit, parandavad vead ära ja kirjutavad sama paberi alumisse
ossa, mida nad on teinud parandustöödes ja piloot saab raporti tagasi,
et valmistuda järgmiseks lennuks. Keegi ei saa väita, et mehaanikutel
pole huumorimeelt.
Siin on mõned tõelised, registreeritud vigaderaportid, milled on
kirjutanud Quantase piloodid ja vastanud mehaanikud. Huvitav on see, et
Quantas on ainuke suurem lennufirma, kus ei ole ühtegi tõsist õnnetust
juhtunud.
P = probleem, piloodi poolt kirjutatud
V = vastus mehaanikult
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P: peaaegu peaks ära vahetama vasaku poole sisemise ratta
V: olen peaaegu ära vahetanud vasaku poole sisemise ratta
P: proovilend läks hästi, välja arvatud see, et automaatne maandumine
oli pisut kõva
V: sellele lennukile ei ole mingit automaatset maandumissüsteemi
installeeritudki
P: propeller nr.2 ei saa piisavalt määret
V: kõik on korras propeller nr.2 määrdega, propelleritel nr.1, 3 ja 4 on
määrdeviga
P: juhikabiinis on midagi lahti
V: juhikabiinis on midagi kinni pandud
P: surnud putukad esiklaasil
V: elusad putukad on tagavaraks laos
P: autopiloot teeb, et lennuk kukub 200 jalga siis kui lennukõrgus
lukustada
V: ei saa maa peal seda probleemi taasluua
P: märk lekkimisest parema poole maandumistelikul
V: märk eemaldatud
P: uskumatult kõva müra salongis
V: müra on reguleeritud rohkem usutavale tasemele
P: kahtlustan, et esiklaasis on pragu
V: kahtlustan, et sul on õigus
P: puudub mootor nr.3
V: mootor leitud paremal tiival pärast lühikest otsimist
P: lennuk käitub naljakalt
V: lennukile on antud korraldus ennast kokku võtta, lennata korralikult
ja olla tõsisem
quote:Maxike: Pärast lendu kirjutab piloot raporti,
Manetu tõlge orignaalist paluks paremaid palu
nagu härra soovib
After every flight, Qantas Airlines pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction.
The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor.
Here are some supposedly actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution as recorded by Qantas maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. (P = The problem logged by the pilot.) (S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.)
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it's so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on her advice I wish to say the following:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that The United States is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you're accepting these terms:
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It's freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
Best Regards (without prejudice)
Name withheld (Privacy act).
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Saab 900 cabrio
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Natuke huumorit vol.27Flagracer:
Here in Minesota the snow doesn't fall with the salt already added either, we add it ourselves. The news yesterday gave the informed opinion that municipalities use more salt than sand these days because cars are made "almost entirely out of plastic". Where can I get one of those??
Salt isn't required to make rust, it simply provides a LOT more free electrons for corrosion to occur faster. Unfortunately, all you need to make rust are oxygen and water.
quote:Jesper: Küsimuse koostajad on sama lollid, nii Kuu kui Päike tiirlevad kenasti ümber Maa, geotsentrilises taustsüsteemis.
Kui ma õigesti kuulasin, siis räägiti seal ka gravitatsioonist, ma küll pole selles keeles eriti käpp, aga kas gravitatsiooni sissetoomisega ei ellimineeri sedasama geotsentrilist taustsüsteemi?
Natuke huumorit vol.27Ei, gravitatsiooni poolest võib vabalt ka raskem keha kergema ümber tiirelda, aga noh ma arvan et see küsimus ei olnud nii diibilt mõeldud üldse, eks see vastaja lihtsalt jooksis kokku seal suure pinge all.
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